Ex-Masturbator shirts bring the WTF hardcore

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus, retards, WTF
• Date: Feb 4,2009

You will not – repeat – NOT ever see me wearing one of these shirts, unless it’s around people who know me for the person I am and can have a good laugh at the expense of The Passion for Christ Movement.

Tim LaHaye: God’s Sex Counselor

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus, retards, sex
• Date: Dec 26,2008

So, you know all those books about the devil and revelations and Armageddon and the rapture and shit that so many of my fellow countrymen are more than eager to empty their wallets for?

Turns out, it wasn’t his first stab at writing something that Christians would eat up. Nope. One of his first books, as co-authored with his wife?

LaHaye recounts how his publisher asked him and his wife Beverly to collaborate on “a book that is sorely needed today, written by a Christian couple [that] would concern the sexual adjustment in marriage.”

Hot shit this is gonna be good.

“Upon his wife’s signal and while continuing to massage her clitoral area, the husband should use his free hand to take a lubricating jelly (which should be placed on the nightstand in advance) and lubricate the head and shaft of his penis before entrance.”

Ohhhhhh…… yeeeaaaaahhhhhh…..

Wow. Just sort of speechless about Erica Campbell.

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , Erica-Campbell, jesus
• Date: May 16,2008

As you know, she’s been a favorite around here since day. one. Always referred to as “the happiest naked girl you’ll see today,” show me a set where she’s not, at some point, smiling straight at you and I’ll buy you a beer.

Looks like there’s been a change of plans for her modeling career:

I have decided to leave the world of adult and porn behind me….and follow the lord. I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and am devoting my life to HIS WILL. I have found the one thing that can, will and DOES fill that void…and that’s GOD.

I really, honestly, didn’t see that one coming.

Wow.

I will not be attending glamourcon or shooting anything else. The next and last person that will see and enjoy my body will be a husband AS GOD INTENDED! I have asked for forgiveness for what I have done AND HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN! I will spend the rest of my life doing the Lords will and the Lords work. I AM HIS!

Well, here’s a look at some recent Erica goodness…

via Fleshbot

Found while on teh Internets

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus
• Date: Apr 30,2008

I don’t know quite why, but I found that very repulsive. Ew.

Sad, really.

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus
• Date: Oct 9,2007

Talk about overkill…

OCTOBER 8–An Alabama minister who died in June of “accidental mechanical asphyxia” was found hogtied and wearing two complete wet suits, including a face mask, diving gloves and slippers, rubberized underwear, and a head mask, according to an autopsy report. Investigators determined that Rev. Gary Aldridge’s death was not caused by foul play and that the 51-year-old pastor of Montgomery’s Thorington Road Baptist Church was alone in his home at the time he died (while apparently in the midst of some autoerotic undertaking). Immediately following his death, church officials issued a press release asking community members to “please refrain from speculation” about what led to Aldridge’s demise, adding that, “we will begin the healing process under the strong arm of our Savior, Jesus Christ.”

But not to worry – it’s not like there’s, like, public records or anything. Talking about anything shoved up anyone’s ass or anything.

Pussies.

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus, random shit
• Date: Oct 1,2007

• Step One: get your godliness posted up on Cruel.com.
• Step Two: receive lots of hits at your forums from Cruel.com
• Step Three: blow away your forums and move somewhere else because “all the atheists started joining, and working behind the scenes to bring it down“

Hi y’all, I’m Katy-Ann, from Mississippi!

Did y’all know that vaccines are made from ABORTED FETUSES?

And that vaccines aren’t responsible for diseases being eradicated, it’s the ADOPTION OF CHRISTIAN HYGIENE PRACTICES?

And that the reason the heathen countries are so full of disease is that they AREN’T SAVED BY CHRIST?

There’s plenty more I’d love to tell y’all. Like how Christian women shouldn’t work outside the home, how evolution is a lie, and especially how the KING JAMES BIBLE is the ONLY WORD OF GOD.

But let’s just start with my TRUTH on vaccines:

Not only do they murder babies, but they then mix that with animal parts, and poisons. When people mix together these kinds of potions in other countries, we automatically recognize them as witchcraft.

Jesus and love y’all!

- Katy-Ann

If you don’t want to buy the hardback.

• Author: mike
• Filed under: , jesus, random shit
• Date: Jul 23,2007